- confessions is the way of life.

going against all odds

2009-08-19T23:02:00.003+08:00

going against all odds.
thats what this video is about.
i dont know why the fuck is related to shampoo.
i dont see any link.

your self- conscious. my numbered days.
hopefully this friday i will be able to see you. take care everyone.

2009-08-17T10:32:00.001+08:00

almost a week passed, time really flies.
what have i been doing i asked myself this very moment.
waiting for you? procuring for the best to come?
since last thursday after that call, i felt like crying.
the feeling isn't like crying over spilled milk but it resembles partially of it.
i didn't cry but it's so difficult to put myself to sleep that night.
i'm so afraid to you neglecting my existence.
maybe i'm thinking too much.

by the way, i went to a&e saturday night again.
my health haven't been so good these days.
my stomach was in such chaotic pain. those sharp pains that come and go.
as if i'm having the monthly thing and the cramps just make me cuddle myself up.
maybe i'm leaving the world soon.
my days are really numbered.

thought of what i will be doing after the 2 years 'probation'.
so many things came to my mind.
i don't know if i want to continue my education.
by the time, i'm out i will already be 22.
ageing isn't one of the major circumstance.
mugging on books and dry topics like business is the main thing.
forcing just myself to get that fucking bachelor's degree.
thoughts roamed randomly before i go to bed.
it's been like so hard to fall deep asleep.
i only wished i could just sleep beside you and never wake up.

then next my ambition came to my mind. repetition of thoughts to say.
of course everyone long wished to have a good job which pays high.
i have the thought of flying, but i just cannot fucking swimming.
how to even evacuate and rescue the passengers when i'm drowning myself in an emergency to come.
i don't know. i got really no idea.
anyway if i'm rich, i don't mind backpacking the whole of my life.
in reality, there's really the margin being drawn between us and the really poor and needy ones.
going to third world countries. i like helping people and giving them a hand.
this has to be put aside first till i got capital to do all these.

enough of all these.
i guessed this is part of life that everyone has to encounter.
take care everyone, hugs..

MUSE

2009-08-10T00:33:00.003+08:00

pardon me for all the whining but sudden muses just come to my mind and conjure certain issues regarding life. too think about that i am not very matured. but to think about it on the other hand, i already started to plan my life after my studies and national service.

i don't really know what's wrong with me these days also.
i muse days over days, nights over nights, literally insomnia happens out of my utmost concerns.
i don't know that i did the correct thing. i analysed issues over and over.
once bitter, twice shy- that's the metaphor saying.
well, this is life.

coming back to reality, i know this guy.
we have been talking for days.
i don't know if i'm ready for it.
the thought of being thoughtful to others and being fair to him came to my mind.
national service- that's a reason why i pulled a handbrake to this issue for the time being.
i don't know why. i haven't even see you in reality.
but it was really heart- warming and sweet, well what better can i expect and ask for from you.
you actually called me before you fly.
maybe i don't deserve that much.
my confidence level dropped so much nowadays.
being in this circle is complicated trust me friends and people out there reading this.

well, enough of my thoughts.
i just wanted to jolt down something here in the case where this place may occur to be an white elephant in time to come.
september is coming...

take care everyone, hugs

2009-08-04T01:08:00.006+08:00

that day is coming real soon.
i hate this feeling.
who knows.
i wont even want to count down to that doomsday.
something like that have to be settled quickly with a real blast.
i just want it to be soon over.

have been roaming around town these days and parties parties parties.
have to curb on my expenses.
curb on clubbings, drinks, cabbing thru and forth for no reasons, etc etc etc.
my card bill busted last month.
i will go dig out the bill and post for viewing.

saw this really cute guy. he looked the most less than 25.
he was pushing a pram with a baby in it.
he was really very charming lo.
he looked aj and he had that really hardcore clubber look.
his dressing sense was damn great.
even bff was very interested in giving him attention.
but when we saw his wife, one word 'cui'.
well, it's not about us being bad or something.
i strongly believed in this one word- Karma
karma in simple words meaning one's action/ doings will results in the same destiny.
wow, sound so chim.

so sad, i have been single for long.
but i'm not available okay..
i guessed i really deserve someone better.

ok ok enough of craps.
set all these aside.
let me show u my latest obsession:

a freaking 150pounds (400+ sgd) for this pair of canvas.
but i saw the real thing.
damn nice.
should i get it??

well guessed enough of my rattlings.
take care everyone, hugs <3>

2009-07-30T15:20:00.002+08:00

it's been quite awhile since i have touched this and updated a single entry.
many things have passed, and just flew through my life part and puzzle, here and there.
remorseful ones, happy ones, damn pissed with it ones, etc etc etc.

a few more days and the calendar will soon to be flipped to the month of august.
i can feel the dreadful amount of money left in myself.
hopefully i can survive.

okay drop all the sad memories.
hopefully i have something more interesting to update in my next entry before i drive you all away from my blog.

take care everyone, hugs..

GEEEE GEEEE GEEEE GEEEEEE Gee cover by Super Junior, SHINee, 2PM, and 2AM.

2009-07-23T00:51:00.002+08:00

Kim Hyun Joong!!!! my JiHoo sunbae

2009-07-13T18:18:00.002+08:00

JULY JULY JULY JULY!!!!!~~~~~~

2009-06-26T00:49:00.005+08:00

I SMELL JULY!!!

what i liked about july is that is my bday month and BFF's too.
what i disliked about this july is that people have been boasting they have 200 bucks from the government which i dont. :(
here's some brilliant suggestions that i have come out with that u all can get for me:

i dont mind hongbaos. nowadays theres nothing that is nice here in sg.

heres another alternative, i dont mind capitamall cash vouchers.
IONOrchard is part of capitamall fyi. :)

i know this is rather impossible, an E71.
so nice right!!! it retails at 600SGD w/o contract.

AHHHHH!!!! CANON IXUS 100
i dont mind the chio red or the gold one.
the chio red totally suits me lo!!
it retails 469SGD

resolution for this year's bday: hopefully that someone is free and would celebrate for me!!

BFF's list still in pending order!!

take care everyone, hugs <3

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!!

2009-06-25T23:10:00.004+08:00

all thanks to someone, this song really really got stucked in my mind the whole day

F**k you (f**k you)
F**k you very very much
Cause we hate what you do and we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
F**k you (f**k you)
F**k you very very much
Cause your words don't translate and its getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

ummm, it's friday tomorrow. going to hang out with BFF and jolene dear tmr.
it's been 3 weeks (tentative) if i dont club this week.
it's DANGEROUS!!! H1N1 is out there. i dont want to be quarantined.
oh well, it really all depends.

take care everyone, hugs<3
esp. the coughing ones, drink plenty of water and turn in early..

2009-06-21T23:37:00.002+08:00

today is 21st june.
whats happening to a month's time????
LOLOLOLLLLOL.
(BFF's one also coming!!!)
wait for my wishlist to appear in a few days time okay.
flu till i sneeze out all my juices of intelligence.
and i didnt club for two consecutive weeks. what an achievement right??

take care everyone, hugs <3

2009-06-19T16:09:00.046+08:00

well, today is just another ordinary other day.
however it's FRIDAY. it denotes weekends.
weekends means partying.
BUT WHY AM I ALWAYS SICK ON FRIDAY????
anyway, much happened these weeks.
many closer ones will/ might have noticed a change in status.
thanks for all your concern. i am really fine.
life goes on without you. hopefully, you can get on with it.
really glad to hear that you got the vacancy at diners.
all the best.

i have been slacking at home, flowing around town like ghost.
eating, sleeping, partying, gossiping still.. LOLOLOLLLOL.

and ya people, i have been owing you all a lot a lot a lot a lot of photos.
so here they are let them do the talking:

here are three new friends i caught that day with becca playing catch catch i think she has 8 of them. how expert i am in catch catch.. LOLOLLLOL.

happily listening to itunes. hahaha

SO CUTE RIGHTTTT??!!?! yups, to continue.

i need more spending money.
anyway, outting with becca was fun. i got this very cool stuff from tangs:

retails at 45 but i go it cheap.
this is so cool.
the last medium sized one.
its like so hinting me to bring it home.
and the X-FACTOR of it is that it GLOWS IN THE DARK!!
see what i meant:

it GLOWS!!

see it in the dark:

and ya.... the very very outdated haikou trip last month:

up in the air in tiger airways

this is bullshit la. what yong yuan shi chun tian. it rained for consecutive days when i was there la.

the airport. HAIKOU MEILAN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
it was raining so heavily when the plane landed.
the plane really slided so far away. how freaky.

the always so deserted counters. LOLLLOLOL.
upon arrival, we were so welcomed by these people:

haha, the people whom wanted to disinfected us before letting us alight.
the plane delayed like fuck too. cant stand these. CMI.
then got temperature taking, plain stupidity!!!!!!!

the haikou hotel that we stopped over:

streets still raining cats and dogs

this is DO-RE-MI in english
in mandarin it's "how beautiful" which isnt.
it sells fried chicken like kfc in singapore, bento sets, youtiao, butterfly, many many snacks, very nice portuguese egg tarts, plus free passive smoking....

on the way to san ya:

then at wen chang:
the village

the very very long vehicle that i have never seen before.
with many many tyres.
supposingly transporting the cement bridge to connect to the ends.

then arrival at relative's house:

aiya, their house is so freaking big as compared to our flats here.
then after the adults settled their tradition stuffs at wen chang, we headed back to haikou:

at arcade, this betting machine, it's like a roulette in the casino, made me won a lot of yuan:

mac for dinner, cus we got sick of the hainanese deliciaies there

mac for breakfast:

yups, i think thats all that i can show and reveal the 'beauty' of hainan island to you all.
take care everyone, hugs <3

2009-06-17T20:15:00.003+08:00

i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.
i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog. i promise i will update my blog.

2009-06-08T23:06:00.002+08:00

well, sorry for not updating the photos in time.
my com seems to have disallowed me and restricts me from doing it.

i deleted my entries which i read and caused further sorrows.
well, im really fine.
at least i know my presence in others. and who i can depend on.

i need therapy. RETAIL THERAPY.!!

take care everyone
hug hugs.

2009-06-08T15:10:00.002+08:00

sad matters, remorseful happenings and sorrows aside.
lead a new life beginning that day.
thanks jolene dear for listening to me.
really appreciate that thought and same mindset that we always shared.
love your attitude too. muacks.

okay, friday went to zirca. crowded crowded crowded is these words to describe the plot.
saturday went alvin's 21st chalet. planned to go BF but was pretty late then so was neglected.
sunday went to chalet again.

today just woke up at this point of time. sitting right in front blogging for the sake of killing time and boredom at home. i wouldnt want to count down to my doomsday. perhaps, i want to look at a brighter prospect side of it. i just hoped everything's going to turn out fine, really fine....

take care everyone, hugs <3

2009-06-05T02:26:00.001+08:00

i really need time to settle down before i face anyone out there.

2009-06-04T01:05:00.000+08:00

well, lets see when was my last entry. almost a month ago.
have been pestered by people to update soon.
so what have i been doing and how fruitful i spent my vacations till enlistment?
- sleeping definitely occupies a big time portion of it
- shopping, well partly here and there
- getting cheapo deals, with up to 66% discount (secret btw bff and hua)
- graduation ceremony, pictures already up on facebook
- china trip, pictures will do the talking
- clubbing, i club lesser and lesser as i age
- eating junk food everyday
- etc. etc. etc.

another insomnia-tic night.
thinking of some much that had happened.
i really ponder will situations get better in time.
i'm craving for mos burger at this point of time.
FUCK blogger for not allowing to upload pictures.!!!

2009-06-01T23:23:00.005+08:00

REVAMP
IN
PROGRESS

please come back again.